bpd · mental health · poetry · spoken word

Time

What do we seek in time and space?

When we leave this world without a trace.

Our ashes might fly into the night sky,

Or dirt may lay on what was once called ‘me’.

Who I am right here means just the same as I was there,

I’m a mystery, an illusion, I’m filled with fantasy and confusion.

What I am to you I was something completely different to someone else.

Part of your thoughts and feelings made me who I am, and will make me who I was.

So why hang onto it all? Our memories, our emotions and our possessions,

Our opinions, our hates, and our lifelong obsessions? 

They will not fly with us into the night sky,

Nor lay with us for eternity as this thing we call time passes us by.

Seek and you shall find,

Escape the walls put up by your mind.

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anxiety · depression · mental health · paranoia · poetry · reading · spoken word · stigma

Empty Screens & Empty Faces

How do I discover my place in this life, where do I fit in?
All that I see in front of me does not gratify the burning need within.
Doomed to feel lonesome while the world continues online,
While here on the outside I find so little to truly call mine.
Who am I out here? Who am I to you?
A profile picture, a twitter account, or someone you can relate to…
I’m not trying to hate or judge nor attempting to offend,
But people seem less genuine in person now and that statement I will defend.
As who takes the time for coffee anymore?
Who looks up from their phone for a moment, to politely hold open the door?
When was the last time you had a date without using an app?
Or the last time you didn’t scroll through your phone when taking a nap?
Have we become powerless with our eyes always glued to a screen!
Missing out on the world around us questioning ‘what does this life really mean?’
The nation calls us zombies walking around like the ‘living dead’,
To get things off our chest, we don’t speak to one another but write a status instead.
Apparently they used to write letters taking the time to know what to say,
Now we just violently tap our phones shoving our feelings out there on display.
Imagine if we went back in time where all this technology didn’t exist,
I feel our relationships with people might be deeper and not so easily dismissed.
I know society doesn’t often allow it but why don’t we try to put our phones down,
Step out the front door and discover real life, not being concerned about others around.
Let’s go back to the basics of human nature and learn how to interact,
Discovering ourselves and the world once more without the internet to distract.
As life isn’t happening on those screens with no heartbeat or face,
It’s here and its surrounding you, so lift up your eyes and don’t let it go to waste.

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charity · depression · grief · news · poetry · reading · spoken word

Humanity

Whatever you believe did we not all arrive here the same?
Confused and frightened not even knowing our name.
Where ever you grew up did not three things remain?
Faith, hope and love before we truly knew pain.
Have you never lost someone you love?
In anguish looked up at the sky and argued with whatever could be above.
We’ve all known anger, fear and have been left feeling hurt,
One day on top of the world next left forgotten in the dirt.
Do we not even simply breathe the same air?
Managing as humans to discover something we can share.
In your chest does there not beat a heart?
One that yearns and aches and sometimes falls apart.
If you take it all away which surrounds us day by day,
Are we not pretty much the same yet unique in our own way?
If you knew my name, my life, my story…
Would you have a second thought before taking it all from me?
Does it not all seem silly this hatred and war?
Like children who never grew up we are always fighting to have more.
More money, more power, more influence and more fame,
to see what this world is coming to I only feel sadness and shame.
What a shame we take that anger and throw it in one another’s face,
Yet ignore the love that’s in our hearts which should bring us together as a human race.

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anxiety · bpd · depression · help · mental health · poetry · reading · spoken word · stigma

The Struggle

Oh how bitter these sorrows taste,
Positive thinking just gone to waste.
I crave a glass of something sharp and sweet,
Only a drop wouldn’t mean I’m a cheat.
These healthy remedies cannot blur my mind,
And depriving me of this escape seems so unkind.
I want to go out dancing and let my hair down,
Have a few shots then hit up the town!
Each drink made me feel lighter as my cares would melt away,
Leading me to believe I’ve outsmarted my dark day.
Yet wait, I see in the distance here comes the storm,
One moment I’m laughing and joking, the next I transform!
Becoming this tornado destroying everything in my path,
I beg don’t get in my way as I cannot stop my wrath!
Sweet liquid you tricked me, I thought you’d set me free,
Why can’t I be like the others having fun around me?
These feelings become a fire of which even you can’t put out,
A flammable liquid that once taken sends the flames throughout.
Even though I know this is the outcome I still struggle to avoid,
watching others out there having fun makes me so annoyed!
But all the things your poison stole from me cuts deeper than any knife,
and even though the struggle is real without you I’ve had a chance to take back my life.

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depression · mental health · open mic · poetry · reading · self image · spoken word · stigma

Spoken Word Poetry

 London Capture6

I have officially done my first ever spoken word event at the Canvas Cafe near Brick Lane in London for Mad Poets Speak!!!

Since I was in primary school I have written poetry and fallen in love with it’s language and the way we can use words to express emotions and thoughts turning them into something unique and beautiful.

Yesterday was the first time I have ever got up in front of others and read out my work, and though it was nerve racking it was an amazing experience.

The theme was mental health and the poems others read were incredible and so relatable, hearing others share their wonderful work and their experiences really did in my eyes help break the stigma.

I hope to discover more spoken word events and also events speaking on mental health.

To watch the video please click HERE

 

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also had this amazing vegan freakshake at the cafe!!!